Lightning Fill In The Blank

Originally published on March 26, 2011 11:33 am
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PETER SAGAL, Host:

Now on to our final game, Lightning Fill in the Blank. Each of our players will have sixty seconds in which to answer as many fill in the blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer is now worth two points. Carl, can you give us the scores?

CARL KASELL, Host:

We have a tie for first place, Peter. PJ O'Rourke and Charlie Pierce, they both have three points and Kyrie O'Connor has two.

SAGAL: Kyrie, you're in third place. You're up first. The clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank. This week four journalists from the New York Times who had been captured in blank were released.

KYRIE O: Libya.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: According to new census data, 1 in 6 Americans are of blank heritage.

CONNOR: Hispanic.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Amazon offered free downloads of the game Angry Birds to kick off the launch of their new blank store.

CONNOR: App store.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Award-winning sports journalist Kevin Provencher of New Hampshire said that the decline of the newspaper industry had forced him to blank.

CONNOR: Start a prostitution ring.

SAGAL: Exactly.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Become a pimp.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Former Cuban leader Fidel Castro said that he was surprised by the stir he caused when he said he gave up control of Cuba's blank party in 2006.

CONNOR: Communist.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week Facebook announced that it kicks thousands of users off every day because they are too blank to join.

CONNOR: Too dull?

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: No.

SAGAL: There would be no Facebook.

PJ O: Not possible.

SAGAL: If that was their policy. Young. Police say it wasn't a good idea for a man in New York to bring a blank to his DWI court appearance.

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

CONNOR: Beer.

SAGAL: A sack of beers, yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

CONNOR: Oh.

SAGAL: The one open can of Busch in his hand wasn't enough for Keith Gruber, who figured the courthouse wouldn't be selling beer.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: The judge asked Gruber...

CONNOR: And he was right.

SAGAL: If he enjoyed his liquid lunch. Gruber said he did. Then he was sent to jail when it came out he had not brought enough for everyone.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Despite his best effort. Carl, how did Kyrie do on our quiz?

KASELL: Kyrie had six correct answers for 12 more points. She now has 14 points and Kyrie has the lead.

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: All right. We flipped a coin. Charlie has elected to go third. PJ, you are up next. Fill in the blank.

ROURKE: All righty.

SAGAL: The CEO of Sprint Nextel said that he is worried the cell phone industry will suffer after blanks deal to buy T-Mobile.

ROURKE: AT&T.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: In a major change, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommended that children ride in rear facing blank until age 2.

ROURKE: Baby seats.

SAGAL: Yeah, car seats.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A state appeals court in Wisconsin declined to rule on whether to allow a law stripping workers of their blank rights.

ROURKE: Their labor negotiating rights.

SAGAL: Yeah, collective bargaining.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Former secretary of state blank died this week at age 85.

ROURKE: That was Elizabeth Taylor's fifth husband.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: It was Warren Christopher in fact.

ROURKE: Ah.

SAGAL: According to the AP, the underwear bombing suspect targeted a flight to Detroit because blank.

ROURKE: It was cheap.

SAGAL: It was the cheapest flight he could get.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: After she was kidnapped from a farm in Romania, a blank ran home at 40 miles per hour.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

ROURKE: It had better be a horse.

SAGAL: It was an ostrich.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: A British couple won their lawsuit against a wedding photographer who gave them a DVD of the big day containing blank.

ROURKE: Pornography.

SAGAL: No. Video of people's feet.

The wedding photographer Clayton Bennett missed the cake cutting, several speeches, and got several shots of feet and bodies with heads cut off. He did get beautiful footage, though, of some people who had nothing to do with the wedding. The newlyweds were unhappy, but in truth Bennett gave them a gift: they can live their lives blissfully ignorant of the fact that even if it didn't suck, still no one would ever want to watch their wedding video.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Carl, how did PJ do on our quiz?

KASELL: PJ had four correct answers for eight more points. He now has 11 points, but Kyrie has the lead.

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: All right, so how many then does Charlie need to take it from her and win the game?

KASELL: Six correct answers.

SAGAL: Six correct answers. Here we go, Charlie, this is for the game. Fill in the blank. Residents of Tokyo were concerned this week over the levels of radiation that had leaked into the city's blank.

CHARLIE PIERCE: Water.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: The Federal Aviation Authority has launched a nationwide investigation after the only person manning a blank at Reagan National Airport fell asleep.

PIERCE: The only person as an air traffic controller.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Jury selection began in the trial of Conrad Murray, the Los Angeles Doctor charged in the death of blank.

PIERCE: Michael Jackson.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Just weeks after Taco Bell beef was found to have 33% meat, a Swedish company has claimed their sausage is blank.

PIERCE: Meatless?

SAGAL: No, 104% meat.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: It's extra meat. Four year old celebrity polar bear blank died unexpectedly at the Berlin Zoo last weekend.

PIERCE: I forgot his name, Dwayne.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

ROURKE: That was Elizabeth Taylor's 14th husband.

SAGAL: Knut, Knut, or Knut I guess. Charged with lying to a grand jury about whether he took steroids, the trial of home run king blank began this week.

PIERCE: Barry Bonds.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: When a man tried to rob a pizza place in Tulsa, employees told him that he couldn't rob them because blank.

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

PIERCE: Because it was against the law.

SAGAL: Because they had just been robbed a few minutes before.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: It was rob Papa Johns in Tulsa night, apparently. The man who came in through the front door to rob Papa Johns was out of luck because the guy who had come through the back door to rob Papa Johns a few minutes earlier had cleaned them out. The front door thief apologized and promised that he and the other Tulsa thieves would do a better job coordinating their schedules in the future.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Carl, did Charlie do well enough to win?

KASELL: He needed six correct answers to win, Peter, but Charlie had just four correct answers.

SAGAL: Oh no.

KASELL: So with 14 points, Kyrie O'Connor is...

CONNOR: Thanks, guys.

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Waterbury native.

ROURKE: Home court advantage.

SAGAL: Exactly.

ROURKE: Home court advantage.

SAGAL: This week we heard about the Obama Doctrine for the first time. In just a minute, we'll ask our panelists to predict once the president finally explains the Obama Doctrine what will it be.

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC) Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.